I remember it as if it were only yesterday, and trust me; I don’t remember much these days. It was about 1971, maybe 72′, and I was looking for something, anything, to watch on my 9″ black and white Motorola TV. I’d gone through all the channels, CBS (2), NBC (4), WNEW (5), ABC (7), WOR (9), WPIX (11), and PBS (13). Yeah—that was it—a, WHOPPING 7 Channels. Nothing. Out of pure desperation, I then went over to UHF. Once in a while, you could find something on there, even if it was an old rerun of “Davey and Goliath.” Sure, you had to twist the antenna a few times and give the set a few smacks, but eventually, you got SOMETHING.
On this day . . . I had no idea that my life as I knew it was about to change. It was almost as if time stood still. What was I seeing here? Who were these people? At first glance, two of the three people on my tiny screen seem to be Rock Stars. Long flowing blonde hair, shirts open, chest hair breeding, gold rings, chains, bracelets, watches, and a swagger that even Chris Jericho HIMSELF would have bowed down to. And, that was NOTHING . . . then they spoke.
Man, could these guys talk—the gift of gab that each one of them possessed. The words spilled out of their mouths with a velvety delivery that not even Mel Torme (look him up) could match. I was MESMERIZED as a young pre-teen. But wait—I haven’t even gotten to the third wheel yet, the absolute STAR of this bizarre, three-ring circus.
Bro—the fattest, messiest, most unkempt individual that you had ever seen. His stench was absolutely coming through my TV set. The long, curly, greasy, unwashed hair, the bloodshot, wide open-eyes, and the constant repeating of the phrase, “Tell em’ about it boys, tell em’ about it boys,” as he wildly paced back and forth.
“Luscious” Johnny, “Handsome” Jimmy, the Valiant Brothers, along with their manager “Captain” Lou Albano, was my formal introduction to the World of Professional Wrestling and the WWWF. I had just never seen anything like this before. It was just a SPECTACLE, a Larger than Life Free For All, a Soap Opera, a Magic Show, a Rock Concert, everything it could possibly be to an 11, 12-year-old kid.
The funny thing is—I knew what this was the SECOND I saw it. It was a SHOW. It was the greatest form of entertainment I had ever seen. It wasn’t real, but it wasn’t Hollywood either. No . . . it was BETTER!!!
From that moment on, I was HOOKED. From there, I was introduced to Bruno Sammartino, “Chief” Jay Strongbow, George “The Animal” Steele, “Polish Power” Ivan Putski, and the list marched on. As I grew older, those names would be replaced by Hulk Hogan, “Rowdy” Roddy Piper, “Mr. Wonderful” Paul Orndorf, “Big” John Studd, “King Kong” Bundy, and the list goes on and on and on.
Wrestling ALWAYS WAS and ALWAYS WILL BE about the CHARACTERS. Anybody could be trained to wrestle—ANYBODY—but did you have the Personality and STAR POWER to put ASSES IN SEATS? Would fans, paying customers, stop everything to pluck down their hard-earned money to see YOU? And WHY YOU? Because you were DIFFERENT, there was NO ONE else like you.
Man, it took a Special Breed to be a Pro Wrestler. You had to have the “GIFT,” the “IT FACTOR.” The ability to be a great athlete and a great actor all rolled into one—you had to be “Special.”
But, as all these young marks will tell you today, “THINGS HAVE CHANGED.” You know what— you’re damn right they have. Going into 2023—ANYBODY can be a Professional Wrestler. You don’t need a “Gift,” the “IT Factor,” or the ability to be a great actor and a great athlete simultaneously. You don’t need to look like a wrestler, smell like a wrestler, or act like a wrestler. No, you need a . . . wait for it . . . a “DREAM.” If you had a “DREAM” of being a wrestler when you were 5—then you’re IN!!!
The “ART” of being a Wrestler today is DEAD. Every week people come on my screen that literally look, act and talk like my next-door neighbor. They are just like everybody else. There is nothing special about them. There are no “Luscious” Johnny’s, “Handsome” Jimmy’s, or Captain Lou’s. To be honest with you . . . they are wannabees who will never be.
The fans have lowered the bar. We’ve made it easy for anybody to get into this once “exclusive” club.
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